Can your body language …

• Make a difference in commanding leadership authority?
• Create trust or mistrust within an organization?
• Change your emotions after a stressful day?

Absolutely!!

Leadership authority is a by-product of 2 related aspects of yourself – your physiology and your emotional state. Call them the yin and yang of leadership authority.

The purpose of this article is NOT to give you a list of gestures, postures or leadership do’s and don’ts to communicate authority. Your emotions and your body language are both driven by your mind. And your mind is too complex for such generalizations.

An effective gesture in one context may backfire in another context. A smile may uplift people in certain situations. A smile when someone is angry however may escalate more anger.

The goal of this article is to teach you how to use your body language for communicating leadership authority, building deep trust and even changing your emotional state. Your body language can enhance or destroy your business relationships and influence on others. Let’s look at why.

The Mind Body Leadership Connection

A physiology of confidence is different than a physiology of worry. Your emotions follow your physiology by responding to tension levels, breath rate, speed of movement and your focus. On the other end, scientists now know that different emotions have a clear physiological response shown through your body language.

For example, anger can be detected through such body signals as leaning forward, flushed face and invasion of someone else’s space. Fear often triggers a dry mouth, holding one’s breath, lack of eye contact and other “fight or flight” signals.

You can also intentionally alter your emotional state by altering your physiology. For example, taking a few deep breaths can transform anxiety and stress to relaxation and clarity in an instant.

Create your physiology of leadership.

Have you ever attended a Tony Robbins’ event? If you have, you know that Tony Robbins is Mr. Physiology himself.

Firewalk Steve Gamage (flickr)

He is a master at energizing thousands of people for long 18-20 hour days non-stop. He is a master at teaching participants – scared out of their minds — to walk over hot coals by putting “mind over matter.” His magic?

He builds into your neurology a new physiology to change your state of mind. All that dancing on the stage is for a reason. Pumping your fist in the air … yes, that’s intentional too.  From my involvement in a number of his programs, I learned I can change my emotions in an instant by changing my physiology.

Want to feel more passion? Move more rapidly. Speak more rapidly. Model the physiology of the most passionate people you know.

Want to interrupt anxiety or fear? Look up at the sky, smile and say the made up mantra “cool moss.” The latter is just to distract your mind from thinking fear thoughts.

Want to show authority? Stand tall with feet shoulder width apart and weight equally balanced.   Because authority is nonverbally communicated through height and space, the taller you appear and the more room you occupy, the more you look like you are in command. Remember also to own your space as addressed in Unleashing your Leadership Presence.

The work that Tony Robbins has been doing for decades is now backed by science.

According to researchers at Columbia and Harvard Universities, body language symbolizing power can actually affect leadership decision-making. Those who stood in power poses not only felt more powerful and in control. They were 45% more likely to take risks.

Purposefully expand your posture and you will alter your hormone levels – decreasing cortisol and increasing testosterone. A lower cortisol means lower stress. Higher testosterone means higher energy and an improved mood.

Takeaway: One small change in posture can trigger significant changes in how you feel and what you do.

Create instant trust and influence with your body language.

When you look at charismatic leaders, they have one skill in common – the ability to create deep rapport. Rapport is essential for any meaningful communications to take place — whether between a leader and a peer, between a boss and employee, between a leader and the entire organization.

Anything is possible in the presence of rapport.

Nothing is possible without it.

Dr. Milton Erickson

There is no leadership influence or trust without rapport. Have you ever had the experience of talking to someone and sensing disconnection when they did not respond? It’s uncomfortable not to have rapport with someone. Now you can change all that with rapport building skills, as outlined in this article.

First, however, we need to define what rapport IS and IS NOT. Let’s clarify the common myths about rapport.

Rapport IS …

• Deep unconscious connection with another that creates understanding and trust.
• Appreciating (not necessarily agreeing with) another’s perspective.
• Understanding and accepting another’s feelings.
• A form of influence

Rapport IS NOT about …

• Liking someone
• Small talk
• Similar interests
• Accepting what someone says or does. 

The above means that you can have rapport with someone and not even like them. You can have rapport with someone while disagreeing with them. You can have rapport without needing to create small talk.

People in rapport experience a resonance with each other. They adopt the same posture, gestures, head tilt and rate of breathing. When one leans, the other leans too. All of this body language matching is happening below their conscious awareness.

Step 1: Set an intention of win/win.

The first step is to set an intention for a win/win outcome with someone you would like to build rapport.  Because matching and mirroring physiology (or even written communications) is so powerful for building rapport, it should never be used for manipulative reasons.

Step 2: Match physiology.

Pick at lease one aspect of that person’s physiology you would like to match until you sense rapport.

Below are a few options.

• Smile
• Arms or legs crossed
• Siting back or forward
• Source of breath – chest, under the diaphragm or in the belly
• Rate of breath
• Eye contact
• Eye brows raised
• Tilting of head or body
• Sitting slouched or upright

Credit: PA Photos/Landov

By matching someone’s body language, you put yourself in sync with the other person’s behavior and meet them in their model of the world. It’s magical when it happens! 

The secret to successful rapport building is to match and mirror outside the other person’s conscious awareness. When you match someone’s body language, you would not do so simultaneously with the other person. Instead, you would wait till it is your turn to speak and then use a similar gesture or aspect of posture. This way they become aware of your connection on an unconscious level.

Matching and mirroring is not just a physiological phenomenon. When you are in rapport, you activate the same thinking and feeling circuitry – called mirror neurons – in your brain as in the other person. You think similar thoughts. You feel similar feelings. Doing so creates an instant connection and trust.

Step 3: Test your rapport level.

After you have been matching and mirroring for 5 – 10 minutes, check to see if you have rapport with the other person.

To do so, stop matching and intentionally shift some aspect of your physiology — such as, crossing your legs or leaning back in your chair – and notice what happens.

Does the other person’s body language start to mimic yours?

If so, you are in rapport. Once you have successfully matched, you create an environment in which you can lead the other person where you want them to go.

For a leader, that’s power! The possibilities are endless how a leader can use rapport to influence an individual or an entire organization, such as …

• Getting emotional buy-in from employees for your company’s vision.
• Leading change within your organization without resistance.
• Creating alignment with your peers around a common decision
• Relaxing nervous job candidates during an interview
• Introducing a new way of doing things when a person or team has become fixed in their ways.

Takeaway: Matching and mirroring physiology is one of your most powerful, yet under-utilized, leadership tools for creating rapport and trust.  And you can learn it in minutes.

Final comments

Your body language can make or break your leadership influence, emotional state and trust within relationships. While it’s easy to use your physiology to increase your leadership effectiveness, it does take focus, intention and practice.

Decide right now what situations in the coming week – a meeting, performance review, customer negotiation, etc – in which you will use your body language to communicate authority, build rapport or just feel good for no good reason.

Then email me and let me know the outcome.

The post Top Leaders Communicate Authority Through Body Language. appeared first on The Empowered Business.

In 1987, I flew to LA to a women’s leadership conference for one reason only.  To meet Anita Roddick, founder and “then” CEO of multi-billion dollar franchise,

Photo by David Niblack

The Body Shop, and asked her to write the forward of my book (to which she did say yes).

When I met her, I was stunned how amazingly small she was (even smaller than myself J).  Yet her commanding presence was so powerful, 30 years later, that memory is still vivid in my mind.

Leadership presence includes character, charisma and self-confidence YET is much more.  People with large presence actually exert a magnified energy field or aura.  You feel it.  You know it.  You are impacted by it.

The BIG question is … How can YOU develop your own leadership presence?

It all starts within, even before you speak.  Let’s look at the 3 most important how to’s.

Presence Factor 1: Own Your “Space”

I learned about the importance of owning my space from 3 completely unrelated interests — dancing, professional speaking and Qi Gong.

I learned, for example, to own my space as a speaker by claiming the stage as my “home.” Mentally, saying to myself “This is my place. I am home here. I own it.”   It also meant pausing before I spoke … as I stood centered and grounded on the stage … connecting silently with every single person in the audience.   It meant utilizing the entire stage – not just one area – to move and connect with my audience.

Owning your space is not physical nor visual. It is kinesthetic, energetic and spatial. It’s mindset, attitude, personal power and congruent physiology/tonality all wrapped up in one.

Owning your space is absolutely crucial to become a powerful, influential leader. Practice these 2 steps and you are on your way.

• Decide you belong …

whether it is on the dance floor, on the stage, at the head of a conference table or leading an entire nation.   Know you belong. Claim it. Step into it fully.  It’s your space, your place. And no one else’s.

When you own your space, you are letting your organization know that you believe in your value … that your voice and contribution matter.

Are you a leader that owns your space?

Or do you do everything you can to take up as little space as possible?

In your role, do you tend to shrink back from shining? Uncomfortable with attention? Feel insecure about yourself?

Your feelings about yourself and your ownership of space are directly correlated.   The question is: how do you change one or both?

That brings us to the next step for owning your space.

• Clear your space and make it your own.

According to quantum physics, every living creature has an energy field or space. The problem is that you are bombarded continuously by the demands, thoughts and emotions of others to the point that their energy is in your space. That’s right … their energy is in your space. And you are not even aware of it.

Many of the fears you experience are not even yours. They may be your parents’, spouse’s or colleagues’. They may be the media’s fears about the economy or other social ills. Or any other person for that matter.

The solution … you must clear your inner space of other’s “emotional clutter.” Here’s one simple exercise to do so.

Take a few deep breaths. Now simply observe your self-talk, emotions and thoughts. Are you replaying a conversation in your head? Are you feeling resentful because of another’s actions? Are you anxious about any specific area of your life?

Now set an intention to claim your space, mind and thoughts only for you … no one else. It’s time to clear your space. Imagine a giant magnet or vacuum cleaner – bigger than you – clearing out the “garbage” from your space. Give yourself a minute or so to pull out as much as you can.

Notice how much more space and freedom you now experience. Fill your space with an empowering color that signifies who you are and what you want to project to the world.

Guess what? You now own your space. Keep doing the above steps till owning your space becomes a part of who you are.

Presence Factor 2: Get Into Your Zone (aka “flow state”)

 Like it or not, your imagination drives both your leadership successes and failures. 

What you rehearse in your imagination, you tend to get.  If you imagine yourself going on stage and forgetting your lines, guess what? That’s what will happen

If, on the other hand, you see yourself giving a confident, mesmerizing performance (assuming you prepared), you will likely get that.

Mental rehearsal is a process, using your imagination and 5 senses, that puts you into your flow state. Every Olympic athlete uses it. That’s what got Michael Phelps 18 gold medals!

Phelps would lay in bed, eyes closed, and mentally rehearse the entire race. The start, diving into the water, and every detail of every stroke as though it was happening in real-time. He imagined even his warm up routine, possible mishaps and his responses to them, over and over again.

NOTE: Mental rehearsal is NOT the same thing as visualization. There are 2 main distinctions.

The focus of visualization is on the end result – such as, making a certain income. The focus of mental rehearsal is on the experience and execution – such as feeling confident, your movements and gestures, etc.

Visualization just includes the visual sense or images. When I teach mental rehearsal, I want my clients to use at least 3, ideally all 5, senses to have a powerful internalized “memory” of how they want to show up.

To use mental rehearsal to develop your commanding leadership presence, you need to:

Step 1: Describe how you want to perform

Identify a specific situation where you would like to exhibit leadership presence. Describe in detail … what will you see, feel, hear, smell and taste when you experience presence? For example, I am smiling and energetic. I exude confidence yet remain calm and authentic. I notice the audience engaged and present.

Step 2: Mentally rehearse as though watching yourself in a movie

Imagine you are watching yourself on a movie screen. See yourself showing up with presence in a specific situation. Include rich colors and images that are large and close to make real. See yourself acting decisively and without fear. Now include all sounds – eg., your voice exuding authority and background noises in the room. Include all feelings – temperature, mood, your body moving effortlessly. Who else is with you? What are they doing?

Step 3: Mentally rehearse as though you are in the movie

Now step into the image of yourself and run through the scenario again. This time you are seeing, feeling and hearing it as if it is happening NOW. Allow your imagination to create even greater details, more vivid colors, feeling exactly as you want to feel.

Repeat these 3 steps a number of times before your designated event or situation.

Presence Factor 3: Cultivate Your (Life Force) Energy

Knowing how to work with life force energy – yours and others — is key to successful leadership.  According to the book 15 Commitments of Conscious Leadership,

“We have found that conscious leaders are masters at managing energy. When they allow energy to flow, they are alive, engaged, passionate, on purpose, creative, innovative, intuitive, clear, visionary, playful, relaxed and refreshed. Energy flow is our natural state, but when it’s blocked or interrupted, the life force so essential to great leadership is dampened, and effectiveness wanes immediately and drastically.”

When you learn how to work with and control your life force energy, your leadership presence, influence and performance will skyrocket. Where you put your mental attention can actually change your physical body and emotional energy. Here’s an exercise to demonstrate that. Do it with a partner.

Cultivating Inner Balance

First, put every ounce of your attention on your right ear lobe. Make sure your thoughts are on nothing else. When there, ask your partner to gently push you on the shoulder from the front. You will discover that the slightest touch will put you off balance.

Next, imagine there is a large golden sphere of energy in your belly area, just below the navel. Now put all your attention on this sphere. (In QiGong, we call this your energy center or dantian.) Once all your attention is there, ask your partner again to push your shoulder. Notice the difference. While the shoulder may move toward the back, you spring right back and don’t lose your balance.

Just 3-5 minutes a day, focusing on a golden sphere of energy in your belly is all you need to cultivate mental, emotional and physical balance, as well as build your life force energy. Even YOU can afford that little time for such a high payoff.

Now It’s Your Turn

The 3 strategies above – owning your space, mentally rehearsing and cultivating your life force energy – will put you on your path to a commanding leadership presence.   These strategies only take a small investment of time and daily practice.

As you increase your presence, you will find yourself closing more deals, wowing your audience and/or employees, achieving your vision and igniting passion in your organization.  Not to mention you will feel happier and at ease within yourself.

MAY PREVIEW:

Want to know the leadership secrets for building a climate of trust with your employees?  Stay tune for part 3 of our article series — How To Unlock Your Leadership Influence Instantly — in May.

Want to learn more about leadership influence?   Check out the following articles.

The post Unleashing Your Leadership Presence … appeared first on The Empowered Business.

As mentioned in our article “The Shocking Costs of Hiring Mistakes … And The Secrets to Avoiding Them,“  too many hiring decisions are based solely on past experience and current skills without any regard to the real drivers - – mindset and “fit” – – of top performance.

With permission to reprint his article “Hire for Will;  Teach the Skill,” Ron Alvesteffer, CEO, SEI Service Express, Inc., shares how his company hires top-performing employees – – his secret to achieving SEI growth goals and cultivating an exceptional organizational culture.  Enjoy his wisdom!

(Reprinted with permission from March 27, 2013)

Hire The Will; Teach the Skill

by Ron Alvesteffer

It’s a phrase I often use with leaders at SEI, particularly when they’re recruiting for talent at our organization.

Because SEI is a growing company with an exceptional culture, we’re fortunate that we attract applicants with a high level of skill and aptitude in their areas of expertise.

But we don’t just hire people who can do the job.  By the time they’ve made it past our initial screening process, we’ve determined that they have both the skills and the aptitude to succeed.  We also have many candidates who rise to the top because they have an advanced skill set.

It can be tempting for hiring managers to rush the process because they have extra work that needs to be off-loaded, they don’t have time to sit through more interviews, or they feel pressure from others to fill the position.  In my experience, rushing this critical process does a disservice to the new employee and to the business.  In the end, hiring the wrong person often leads to more work because employees are left to clean up.  Work loads are compounded, the recruiting process must begin all over again, and the pressure that hiring managers feel is exacerbated.

A recent study uncovered that 46% of new hires don’t make it past the first 18 months of employment.  Of those, 89% didn’t make it because of attitudinal reasons, while 11% didn’t make it because of lack of skill.  As a result, companies are experiencing high levels of turn-over which put s a significant strain on productivity, innovation, customer service, revenue, margins, growth and employee engagement.

At SEI we don’t hire the skill; skill can be learned.  We hire the will.

While there are simple tests that can measure both skill and proficiency, for many organizations finding A Players can be both challenging and more resource intensive.

Because one person’s attitude has a significant impact on the culture of an entire organization, recruitment should be a high priority.

David Packard once said “No company can consistently grow revenues faster than its ability to get enough of the right people to implement that growth.”

We guard our culture fiercely and decided early on that we would would take the time necessary to hire people who are a great culture fit for SEI.

SEI is exceptional because our people are exceptional.

—————————————————————————————————————————-

About Ron Alvesteffer:

Ron Alvesteffer is the President of Service Express, Inc and is the author of The SEI Way. He speaks and writes about leadership and on building workplace cultures that produce great results.

***************************************

Questions to ask yourself:

• What are the criteria, traits and attitudes that differentiate an “A” player from a “B” and “C” player for each role in your organization?
• Is every leader on your team performing at an “A” level?  If not, what is your development plan to raise the bar for that leader?
• How do you interview, screen and select for the right attitudes and traits for a given role?
• What lessons have you learned about your own blind spots from past hiring mistakes?

Share your experience, questions and challenges in hiring top talent within your organization in the comment box below.

The post The Secret to Hiring Top-Performing Employees appeared first on The Empowered Business.

The likelihood is, maybe, 1 in a million.

While I have always been a strong proponent of the concept of employee engagement, few authors rarely go into any specific nuts and bolts about how to achieve it.  Not only do I love the fact that this book is based on actual case studies of companies who have achieved a high level of employee engagement.

The authors take engagement to a whole new level — calling it employee entanglement — with a philosophy and system for cultivating employee responsibility, accountability and a leadership mindset that drives exceptional company performance.

That’s powerful stuff!

In Tom Walter’s words, “Like college athletes, engaged employees are valuable, but entangled employees, like Olympians, are the ones who take an organization to new heights. What makes these top-performing employees have such an impact on the success of each of their organizations? What encourages their sense of organizational ownership?

With deep insight into eight award-winning, market-leading companies, It’s My Company Too! explores how the highest-performing organizations entangle employees, systems, culture, and leadership into a unified drive for excellence. The entangled culture emerges from a unique synergy and magnetism within the organization that is the result of leaders:

– Doing extraordinary things

– Building an ethical organization

– Focusing human capital

– Using processes to guide performance

– Building self-efficacy and esteem

– Developing freedom and responsibility within a culture of discipline

– Hardwiring discretionary thinking and actions

– Guiding the transformational process

Through interviews and extensive field research, the authors analyze how companies across industries tackle internal and external challenges, constructing the pieces of the entanglement puzzle. Along the way, they show you how to develop motivated, involved, and entangled employees who embody an organization’s core values, vision, and mission–and succeed beyond imagination.”

Authors:  Thomas J. Walter, Kenneth R. Thompson, Raymond L. Benedetto, Molly Meyer

Buy the book at HERE!

The post Recommended Business Book: “It’s My Company Too!” appeared first on The Empowered Business.