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	<title>The Empowered Business &#187; Beliefs</title>
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		<title>7 Unconscious Leadership Fears That Keep You Small</title>
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		<pubDate>Wed, 17 Jun 2015 18:56:28 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[Denise Corcoran]]></dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Beliefs]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Emotional Mastery]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Leadership Development]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Leadership Performance]]></category>
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		<category><![CDATA[Motivation]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[beliefs]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[brain]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[business success]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[emotional state]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[fear]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[inner game]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[leadership identity]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[leadership performance]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[mindset]]></category>
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		<description><![CDATA[<h2>Which keep you small?</h2>
<div id="attachment_2723" style="width: 310px" class="wp-caption alignleft"><a href="https://www.empoweredbusiness.com/wp-content/uploads/canstockphoto26684759-1-e1434565714253.jpg"><img class="size-medium wp-image-2723" src="https://www.empoweredbusiness.com/wp-content/uploads/canstockphoto26684759-1-300x240.jpg" alt="fears keeping you small" width="300" height="240" /></a>
<p class="wp-caption-text">Fears keeping you small</p>
</div>
<p>&#160;</p>
<p><strong>All leaders have fears.</strong>  However, not all your fears are created equal.</p>
<p><strong>Some may manifest as low level anxieties.</strong>  Some are life paralyzing phobias.  Some may be triggered only by certain events – like fear of public speaking.  Others may be life-long fears.</p>
<p><strong>Then there are the “big guns.”</strong>  These are the <em>core</em> <em>unconscious leadership  fears</em> from which all other fears come.  They override every aspect of your being.</p>
<p>In this article you will learn 7 unconscious leadership fears that keep you small.  First, it’s important to understand the nature of fear.</p>
<p>The post <a rel="nofollow" href="https://www.empoweredbusiness.com/7-unconscious-leadership-fears-that-keep-you-small/">7 Unconscious Leadership Fears That Keep You Small</a> appeared first on <a rel="nofollow" href="https://www.empoweredbusiness.com">The Empowered Business</a>.</p>
]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<h2>Which keep you small?</h2>
<div id="attachment_2723" style="width: 310px" class="wp-caption alignleft"><a href="https://www.empoweredbusiness.com/wp-content/uploads/canstockphoto26684759-1-e1434565714253.jpg"><img class="size-medium wp-image-2723" src="https://www.empoweredbusiness.com/wp-content/uploads/canstockphoto26684759-1-300x240.jpg" alt="fears keeping you small" width="300" height="240" /></a><p class="wp-caption-text">Fears keeping you small</p></div>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><strong>All leaders have fears.</strong>  However, not all your fears are created equal.</p>
<p><strong>Some may manifest as low level anxieties.</strong>  Some are life paralyzing phobias.  Some may be triggered only by certain events – like fear of public speaking.  Others may be life-long fears.</p>
<p><strong>Then there are the “big guns.”</strong>  These are the <em>core</em> <em>unconscious leadership  fears</em> from which all other fears come.  They override every aspect of your being.</p>
<p>In this article you will learn 7 unconscious leadership fears that keep you small.  First, it’s important to understand the nature of fear.</p>
<h2></h2>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<h2><span style="color: #000080;"><strong>3 Truths About Fear Every Leader Needs to Know</strong></span></h2>
<h3><span style="color: #800000;"><strong>1.     Fear is indestructible. </strong></span></h3>
<p><strong>Your brain is wired for fear.</strong> It is essential for your physical survival.  You want fear to send you signals when you are in danger, in an unsafe situation or about to make a high stakes mistake. Fear is your friend in those circumstances.</p>
<h3><span style="color: #800000;"><strong>2.     Fear comes from a mental construct. </strong></span></h3>
<p><strong>Fear is a byproduct of your thoughts. </strong> Your fear thoughts are mental constructs – meaning they have no basis in reality. As the saying goes, fear is <em>“false evidence appearing real.”</em></p>
<p><strong>The emotion of fear is real. </strong> The content of your fear &#8212; your thoughts &#8212; is not real.  In your mind, though, you <em>believe</em> that your fear thoughts are reality.</p>
<p>To free yourself of such fear, you need to dislodge the mental constructs which drive fear.  Fear thoughts are of your own making and they can be unmade.</p>
<h3><span style="color: #800000;"><strong>3.     Fearlessness does not exist.</strong></span></h3>
<p><strong>Are you a leader that fantasizes about the day when you will be free of all fear?</strong></p>
<p>Guess what?  It’s not going to happen.  Buying into the belief of fearlessness is a trap.  It’s an impossible goal to reach!  Even those who have achieved extraordinary feats have fear.</p>
<p><strong>Your goal should not be to eliminate all fear. </strong> Rather it should be, as one author wrote, to<em> feel the fear and do it anyway.</em></p>
<p>Below are 7 core unconscious leadership fears you want to know about.  They are hijacking your leadership success and potential.</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<h2><span style="color: #000080;"><strong>7 Unconscious Leadership Fears That Keep You Small</strong></span></h2>
<p>As a leader, you will be plagued by thousands of fears in your role.  You will have <em>surface fears</em> – such as fear of public speaking or holding employees accountable.</p>
<p>Then there are the <em>deep unconscious leadership fears</em> that enslave you until you break free.</p>
<h3><span style="color: #800000;"><strong>1.     Fear of fear itself</strong></span></h3>
<p><strong>Being a leader is demanding, high stakes work.</strong>  It stretches every ounce of your being.  It tests your strength of courage, perseverance and resilience.</p>
<p><strong>The demands can be so great and the fear so paralyzing that the only way of getting relief is to put your head in the sand and pretend fear does not exist.</strong>  In those circumstances, your dominating fear is of fear itself.</p>
<p><a href="https://www.empoweredbusiness.com/wp-content/uploads/Getting-Unstuck-Medium-e1434568288741.jpg"><img class=" size-full wp-image-2744 alignleft" src="https://www.empoweredbusiness.com/wp-content/uploads/Getting-Unstuck-Medium-e1434568288741.jpg" alt="Fear of fear itself" width="220" height="137" /></a>In the short term, pretending you have no fear to move forward with your goals and actions can actually be a healthy choice.</p>
<p>In the long term, however, the fears you are avoiding will sabotage your every attempt to play a bigger leadership game.</p>
<h3><strong><span style="color: #800000;">2.     Fear of (owning your) power</span></strong></h3>
<p><strong>All leaders are powerful yet few know how powerful they really are.</strong>  True personal power (or lack of it) determines whether you show up on the cause or effects side of your outcomes equation.</p>
<p><strong>Being at the effects side means you believe that things happen to you. </strong> That you have little or no control on your outcomes.</p>
<p><strong>When you own your leadership power, you believe that …</strong></p>
<blockquote>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em>You are at cause for all the results in your life.</em></p>
</blockquote>
<p><strong>If you fear power, it is because you are conflicted about it.</strong>  You have negative associations or beliefs about what power means.</p>
<p>The truth is that you can’t fully contribute your leadership gifts and talents if you fear owning your own leadership power.</p>
<h3><span style="color: #800000;"><strong>3.     Fear of “being found out&#8221;</strong></span></h3>
<p><strong>Within every person, there are 3 selves</strong> &#8212; a <em>Pretend Self,</em> a <em>Feared Self</em> and an <em>Authentic Self</em>.  Your <em>Pretend Self</em>  is that part of you that feels a need to hide behind an imaginary mask.</p>
<p><strong>You don’t want others to know that you feel inadequate in your leadership role.</strong>  You don’t feel as though you’re smart enough, experienced enough, confident enough (fill in the blank) to be in your leadership role.</p>
<p><strong>You take on other personas out of fear of being “found out.”</strong>  You put on a strong face – pretending to have it all together – when deep inside you feel like a fraud.</p>
<p>When you pretend to be someone you are not, you can never be your authentic powerful self.</p>
<h3><span style="color: #800000;"><strong>4.     Fear of sharing your power</strong></span></h3>
<p><strong>The world of leadership is filled with paradoxes. </strong> One of those paradoxes is about power.</p>
<p>To be an exceptional leader, you must own your personal power (as addressed in #2).  Doing so allows you to take charge of your own individual outcomes and be an example to others.</p>
<p><strong>However, once a leader owns their power, he/she tends to hoard it</strong> – such as making all the decisions, resolving all conflicts, leading all meetings, etc.  You hoard power because you fear loss of importance and lack of control if you share it.</p>
<p><strong>Yet for a company to flourish, power must be distributed and shared throughout the organization.</strong>  This means developing employees as personal leaders within their own roles and teams.  Allowing them to make decisions within their own scope.  Giving them the tools and know-how to resolve their own conflicts.</p>
<h3><strong><span style="color: #800000;">5.     Fear of Truth</span></strong></h3>
<p><strong>Reality is truth.  </strong>Yet our brains are not capable of knowing 100% reality.  The reason … your brain can only process less than 1%  all the sensory data at any moment of time.</p>
<p><strong>Your <span style="text-decoration: underline;"><em>sense</em></span> of reality &#8212; or perceived reality – comes from your beliefs,</strong> your sense of identity, your model of the world and so forth.  You become so attached to your own sense of reality, that you avoid new information (truth) that conflicts with your current (limited) thinking.</p>
<p><strong>By no means is fear of truth exclusive to leaders.</strong>  However, avoidance of  truth can have dire consequences to leaders and their organizations. Your actions and decisions are driven by cognitive biases and those biases can be costly.</p>
<p>For example, success often blinds leaders and prevents them from seeing the truth of a looming future ahead.</p>
<h3><span style="color: #800000;"><strong>6.     Fear of losing the known</strong></span></h3>
<p><strong><a href="https://www.empoweredbusiness.com/wp-content/uploads/hangingon-e1434569813442.jpg"><img class=" size-medium wp-image-2746 alignleft" src="https://www.empoweredbusiness.com/wp-content/uploads/hangingon-300x242.jpg" alt="fear of letting go" width="300" height="242" /></a></strong></p>
<p><strong>For your company to grow, leaders must move into foreign territories where they have no prior experience.</strong>  In those situations, you don’t have a mental flashlight to guide you.  That can be scary.</p>
<p><strong>In reality, it’s NOT your fear of the unknown that stops you. </strong> After all, how can you fear something you don’t even know about?!</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><strong>What you really fear is …</strong></p>
<blockquote>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em>Fear of losing (or letting go) of the known</em></p>
</blockquote>
<p><strong>As you grow to new leadership levels, the new possibilities can be endless. </strong> Yet seldom does your mind see these new changes as amazing opportunities.  Instead, you …</p>
<p>·      Fear losing your sense of safety when making a leap</p>
<p>·      Fear letting go of current routines and habits that give you predictability</p>
<p>·      Fear letting go of who you are for who you can be</p>
<h3><span style="color: #800000;"><strong>7.     Fear of your own brilliance</strong></span></h3>
<p>While it is a rare leader who hasn’t dreamed of standing on the shoulders of giants, boldly stepping out and realizing your own greatness is a scary proposition.</p>
<p><strong>Yes, the majority of leaders fear their own brilliance.</strong></p>
<p><em>How do I know?</em></p>
<p><strong>I observe it in such behaviors as …</strong></p>
<p>·      Getting caught up in distractions – such as, always looking at your cell phone</p>
<p>·      Mindless activities</p>
<p>·      Chasing the externals to make you feel good about yourself.</p>
<p>Being visible in the world … rising above mediocrity … standing in the light of your authentic self, that takes radical courage.</p>
<p><strong>Fear does not have rule you. </strong> The key is to know how to dislodge it.</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<h3><span style="color: #000080;"><strong>Dislodge Your Unconscious Leadership Fears in 5 Minutes </strong></span></h3>
<h3><span style="color: #800000;"><strong>Step1:  Name your fear.</strong></span></h3>
<p>To break the hold of your fear, first name it.  Boil it down to a single word – like SeenAsFake.</p>
<h3><span style="color: #800000;"><strong>Step 2:  Personify your fear.</strong></span></h3>
<p>For example, if you fear fear itself, perhaps you personify it as a big black monster.  If you fear power, perhaps you imagine it as Hitler or mean sergeant.</p>
<h3><span style="color: #800000;"><strong>Step 3:  ID visual and auditory associations with your fear persona </strong>(identified in #2).</span></h3>
<p>When you think of your fear persona …</p>
<p>·      What’s the characteristics of the picture?  Black and white or colored?  Large or small?  Near or far?</p>
<p>·      What does he/she/it sound like?  Deep or high voice?   Fast or slow pace?  Loud or soft?</p>
<h3><span style="color: #800000;"><strong>Step 4:  Change the identified associations above to their opposites to transform your fear. </strong></span></h3>
<p>For example,</p>
<p>·      If your fear picture is black/white, large and near, change it to color, small and far.</p>
<p>·      If your fear voice has a low pitch, loud volume and slow pace, change it to high pitch, low volume and fast pace.</p>
<p>That’s it!  With this simple 4 step process, your fear will transform from a roar to a whisper.</p>
<h3><strong>Want to know more secrets how to rise to the top of your leadership game? </strong></h3>
<p>Sign up for our free report below &#8212; <em>Wired to Win Big:  7 Inner Game Leadership Strategies to Rise to the Top and Stay There.  </em>The only game you ever need to win is the game within your mind!</p>
<p>The post <a rel="nofollow" href="https://www.empoweredbusiness.com/7-unconscious-leadership-fears-that-keep-you-small/">7 Unconscious Leadership Fears That Keep You Small</a> appeared first on <a rel="nofollow" href="https://www.empoweredbusiness.com">The Empowered Business</a>.</p>
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		<title>Real Truths That Fuel Real Leaders</title>
		<link>https://www.empoweredbusiness.com/real-truths-that-fuel-real-leaders/</link>
		<comments>https://www.empoweredbusiness.com/real-truths-that-fuel-real-leaders/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 11 Nov 2014 23:29:12 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[Denise Corcoran]]></dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Accountability]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Beliefs]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Emotional Mastery]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Goal Achievement]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Leadership Development]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Leadership Performance]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Mindset]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Organizational Performance]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[accountability]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[conflict]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[creating your future]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[emotional state]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[inner game]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[leadership performance]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[mindset]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[motivation]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[overcoming obstacles]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[playing to win]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[results]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[truth]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.empoweredbusiness.com/?p=2344</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[<p style="text-align: left;" align="center"><strong>From early childhood, we were all taught never to lie.</strong> That was drilled into our psyche with such stories as <em>Pinocchio </em>and <em>George Washington and the Cherry Tree</em></p>
<p><a href="https://www.empoweredbusiness.com/wp-content/uploads/truth-e1415748644658.jpg"><img class="alignleft size-full wp-image-2373" title="Real truths  that fuel real leaders" src="https://www.empoweredbusiness.com/wp-content/uploads/truth-e1415748903303.jpg" alt="leadership truths" width="300" height="198" /></a>I learned growing up, however, that <strong><em>not lying</em> is NOT the same thing as <em>admitting and telling the truth.</em> </strong> The former prevents us from making false statements; the latter has the generative power to change individuals and organizations.</p>
<p>In my decades of working with business leaders, I have found that there is one trait &#8212; above all others – that transforms mediocre leaders to extraordinary ones.   That one trait is …</p>
<h3 align="center"><span style="color: #000000;"><strong>Rigorous truth-telling</strong></span></h3>
<p style="text-align: left;" align="center">Real leaders have backbone. </p>
<p>The post <a rel="nofollow" href="https://www.empoweredbusiness.com/real-truths-that-fuel-real-leaders/">Real Truths That Fuel Real Leaders</a> appeared first on <a rel="nofollow" href="https://www.empoweredbusiness.com">The Empowered Business</a>.</p>
]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p style="text-align: left;" align="center"><strong>From early childhood, we were all taught never to lie.</strong> That was drilled into our psyche with such stories as <em>Pinocchio </em>and <em>George Washington and the Cherry Tree</em></p>
<p><a href="https://www.empoweredbusiness.com/wp-content/uploads/truth-e1415748644658.jpg"><img class="alignleft size-full wp-image-2373" title="Real truths  that fuel real leaders" src="https://www.empoweredbusiness.com/wp-content/uploads/truth-e1415748903303.jpg" alt="leadership truths" width="300" height="198" /></a>I learned growing up, however, that <strong><em>not lying</em> is NOT the same thing as <em>admitting and telling the truth.</em> </strong> The former prevents us from making false statements; the latter has the generative power to change individuals and organizations.</p>
<p>In my decades of working with business leaders, I have found that there is one trait &#8212; above all others – that transforms mediocre leaders to extraordinary ones.   That one trait is …</p>
<h3 align="center"><span style="color: #000000;"><strong>Rigorous truth-telling</strong></span></h3>
<p style="text-align: left;" align="center">Real leaders have backbone.  They admit the uncomfortable truth that others are not willing to even see.  They have a <em>passion to <span style="text-decoration: underline;">want the truth</span></em> and confront reality head-on.</p>
<p><strong>It’s not just the responsibility of a leader to see and tell the truth.  It is part of their soul, their moral fiber. </strong> Any compromise destroys trust, respect and credibility with themselves and from others.</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<h3><span style="color: #333399;">T<strong>h</strong><strong>e most important person to tell the truth is to Yourself.</strong></span></h3>
<p>We often think about the importance for leaders to tell the truth to others within their organizations.  <strong>Yet the most important, yet hardest, aspect of leadership truth telling is being <em>rigorously </em>honest with yourself.</strong></p>
<p><em>Why?</em></p>
<p><strong>It takes guts, personal awareness and humility to tell the truth about yourself to yourself.</strong></p>
<p>When I work with leaders, my first goal is to help them get rigorously honest with themselves.  I have found that when leaders are willing to look at how they they avoid or deny the truth, that mirror of truth will liberate them to become the authentic, powerful leader they are meant to be.</p>
<p><strong>Not sure how to uncover your truth as a leader? </strong>  Take inventory of the following 7 truths to get real about the present and to fuel your leadership changes in the future.</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<h2><span style="color: #800000;"><strong>7 Real Truths That Fuel Real Leaders</strong></span></h2>
<h3><span style="color: #333399;"><strong>Truth 1:</strong><strong>  </strong><strong>Either you are fighting for reasons or fighting for results.</strong></span><strong> </strong></h3>
<p><strong>As a leader, there is no middle ground in what you stand for.</strong> You can stand for reasons or you can stand for results.  You CAN”T stand for both.</p>
<p>Real leaders fight for the results they want.  They are bold, committed and persistent about their desired outcomes.</p>
<p><strong>Mediocre leaders fight for reasons why they don’t achieve them</strong>. When they say “yes” to reasons, they are essentially saying “no” to results.</p>
<p><em>Which are you fighting for right now?</em></p>
<p><strong>Ask these questions to reveal your <em>truth</em>:</strong></p>
<ul>
<li><em>Are you tolerating under-performance?</em></li>
<li><em>When you lead a meeting, to what extent do team members give <span style="text-decoration: underline;">reasons</span> why they did not keep their commitments or reach their goals?</em></li>
<li><em>Have you created an organizational culture of strong accountability?</em></li>
</ul>
<h3><span style="color: #333399;"><strong>Truth 2:</strong><strong>  </strong><strong>Either you are creating your future or reacting to it.</strong><strong> </strong></span></h3>
<p><strong>Real leaders are masters at creating their future</strong> because they are internally driven and decisive about what they want.   They take responsibility for all their outcomes and see themselves as the doers of the world.</p>
<p><strong>Mediocre leaders are externally driven and <em>at the effects</em> of their environment.</strong>  They believe that they have little control over their outcomes and that things happen <span style="text-decoration: underline;">to</span> them.</p>
<p>A<strong>sk these questions to reveal your <em>truth</em>:</strong></p>
<ul>
<li><em>Does your organization find itself in perpetual crises?</em></li>
<li><em>When a negative event happens – like loss of a major customer, do you find yourself in panic or do you seek new options to achieve your goals?</em></li>
<li><em>Does your organization have a clear vision in which every employee knows how he/she contributes?</em></li>
</ul>
<h3><span style="color: #333399;"><strong>Truth 3:</strong><strong>  </strong><strong>Either you are playing to win or playing not to lose.</strong></span></h3>
<p><strong>Underlying this truth, there is a pivotal assumption that realleaders get and mediocre leaders don’t.</strong></p>
<p><em>What is that pivotal assumption?</em></p>
<p><strong>It is that you have a clear understanding of what <em>winning</em> is.</strong>  Mediocre leaders never even ask themselves questions like … <em>where do we want to win?  Where can we win?  What does winning look like? </em><em> </em></p>
<p>Once you have a clear concept of winning, how do you know if you are playing to win vs. playing not to lose?</p>
<p><strong>The answer is: your <em>identity</em>.</strong></p>
<p><strong>Ask these questions to reveal your <em>truth</em>:</strong></p>
<ul>
<li><em>Do you see yourself as a winner even when you fail?</em></li>
<li><em>Does the thought of risking to win trigger fear in you?</em></li>
<li><em>Do you have a winning strategy to reach your company’s goals?</em></li>
</ul>
<h3><span style="color: #333399;"><strong>Truth 4:</strong><strong>  </strong><strong>Either you are growing or you are stagnating.</strong></span></h3>
<p>For your company to grow, you must grow as a leader.  When you stagnate, so will your company.  It’s that simple.</p>
<p><strong>Real leaders do the things that others think they cannot do</strong>.   They continuously “push the envelope” in what is possible.</p>
<p><strong>Mediocre leaders avoid discomfort. </strong> I mean really avoid it.  Discomfort for them triggers fear and threatens their sense of safety and survival.</p>
<p><strong>Ask these questions to reveal your <em>truth</em>:</strong></p>
<ul>
<li><em>Do you push yourself out of your comfort zone daily?</em></li>
<li><em>Are you comfortable with discomfort?</em></li>
<li><em>Do you thrive on challenges or shrink from them?</em></li>
</ul>
<h3><span style="color: #333399;"><strong>Truth 5:</strong><strong>  </strong><strong>Either you embrace conflict or you avoid it.</strong></span></h3>
<p>Conflict has become a dirty word in the business world.</p>
<p><strong>Mediocre leaders avoid conflict at all costs.</strong>  It’s viewed as painful, scary and a win/lose situation at best.  As a result, their organizations become homogenous and filled with “yes” people.</p>
<p>As Jim Collins, author, <em>Good to Great, </em>concluded from his extensive research, the #1 difference between good and great companies is that the leaders of great companies fostered healthy conflict to set direction and create innovative solutions for the future.</p>
<p><strong>Ask these questions to reveal your <em>truth</em>:</strong></p>
<ul>
<li><em>Do your employees ever disagree with your decisions or viewpoints?</em></li>
<li><em>Is there pseudo-harmony within your team?</em></li>
<li><em>Do you tend to placate others whose viewpoints are different than yours?</em></li>
</ul>
<h3><span style="color: #333399;"><strong>Truth 6:</strong> <strong> Either your actions are moving you “toward” or “away from” your goals.</strong><strong> </strong></span></h3>
<p><strong>All behavior is self-motivated.</strong>  Your actions are motivated either to move <span style="text-decoration: underline;">toward </span>something positive or <span style="text-decoration: underline;">away </span>from something negative/painful.</p>
<p><strong>Real leaders are “toward” motivated.</strong>  There is always the next horizon to reach.  Mediocre leaders tend to be “away from” motivated, driven by negative beliefs or secondary gains.  Their primary focus is on what they don’t want, rather than on what they want.</p>
<p><strong>Ask these questions to reveal your <em>truth</em>:</strong></p>
<ul>
<li><em>Are your actions mainly focused on reaching your goals or eliminating problems?</em></li>
<li><em>Are any of your actions (such as, checking emails, going to certain meetings, etc.) really a distraction and taking you off-course?</em></li>
<li><em>Are you focused more on what you want or what you don’t want?</em></li>
</ul>
<h3><span style="color: #333399;"><strong>Truth 7:</strong><strong>  </strong><strong>Either you are truly leading or merely following.</strong></span></h3>
<p><strong>Real leaders understand that leadership is a way of thinking and a way of engaging with others. </strong> They take bold steps into the future and hold themselves and others to high standards.    They see themselves as a leader of leaders and their job is to develop other leaders.</p>
<p><strong>Mediocre leaders seek recognition from their team over respect,</strong> decide through consensus and deflect responsibility for results and problems to others.</p>
<p><strong>Ask these questions to reveal your <em>truth</em>:</strong></p>
<ul>
<li><em>Do you tend to focus on solutions or problems?</em></li>
<li><em>To what extent are your employees “rowing the boat in the same direction?”</em></li>
<li><em>Is most of your day spent on completing tasks or growing your people?<br />
</em></li>
</ul>
<h2></h2>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<h2><span style="color: #800000;"><strong>The Greatest Truth of All</strong></span></h2>
<p>The greatest truth of all … is that,</p>
<p align="center"><strong>Truth is power.</strong></p>
<p>I know that admitting the truth about yourself can sting in the moment.  And avoiding the truth may seem like the easier route.</p>
<p><strong>In reality, hiding from the truth is like having a 10,000 lb. weight on your shoulders that drags you down.</strong>  It holds you and your organization back.  It keeps you in stress and struggle.</p>
<p><em>Are you ready to dump the baggage?</em></p>
<p><strong>Start by using the above 7 truths to get honest with yourself:</strong></p>
<p>Are you …</p>
<ul>
<li>fighting for results?</li>
<li>focused on creating the future?</li>
<li>playing to win?</li>
<li>growing and getting out of your comfort zone?</li>
<li>leveraging conflict to create innovative solutions?</li>
<li>taking actions that move you “toward” our goals?</li>
<li>truly leading?</li>
</ul>
<p>Only when you admit reality can you seize your true leadership power and take charge of yours/your organization’s fate.</p>
<p><strong><em>Which of these leadership truths is holding you back the most?  What support do you need to have a breakthrough?</em></strong></p>
<p><strong> </strong></p>
<p><em> </em></p>
<p>The post <a rel="nofollow" href="https://www.empoweredbusiness.com/real-truths-that-fuel-real-leaders/">Real Truths That Fuel Real Leaders</a> appeared first on <a rel="nofollow" href="https://www.empoweredbusiness.com">The Empowered Business</a>.</p>
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		<title>Are You Addicted to Codependent Leadership?</title>
		<link>https://www.empoweredbusiness.com/are-you-addicted-to-codependent-leadership-7-clues-you-are/</link>
		<comments>https://www.empoweredbusiness.com/are-you-addicted-to-codependent-leadership-7-clues-you-are/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 17 Oct 2014 23:06:06 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[Denise Corcoran]]></dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Accountability]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Beliefs]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Company Culture]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Emotional Mastery]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Leadership Development]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Leadership Performance]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Mindset]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Motivation]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Teams]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[behavioral patterns]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[beliefs]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[boundary issues]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[caretaking]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[co-dependency]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[conflict]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[control]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[culture]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[emotions]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[employee happiness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[leadership performance]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[low self-esteem]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[people-pleasing]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[power]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[saying "no"]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[smartblog.com]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[values]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[<h2>7 Clues You Are.</h2>
<address> </address>
<address>Note:  This post was originally published on August 25, 2014 on SmartBlogs.com.</address>
<address> </address>
<p><a href="https://www.empoweredbusiness.com/wp-content/uploads/canstockphoto8522797.jpg"><img class="alignleft size-medium wp-image-2333" title="Boundaries" src="https://www.empoweredbusiness.com/wp-content/uploads/canstockphoto8522797-300x225.jpg" alt="codependency" width="300" height="225" /></a>If you are a sucker for great leadership movies like I am &#8212; Invictus, Coach Carter and Moneyball just to name a few, it’s easy to assume that all leaders embody the same qualities as those in the movies.</p>
<p>Afterall, who hasn’t idealized business leaders to be strong, confident, make tough decisions and stand their ground no matter what?</p>
<p>While those leaders do exist, they are a minority.  In working with leaders for 30 years, I have found that the reality is shockingly different.</p>
<p>Most leaders take on their roles with the greatest of positive intentions. </p>
<p>The post <a rel="nofollow" href="https://www.empoweredbusiness.com/are-you-addicted-to-codependent-leadership-7-clues-you-are/">Are You Addicted to Codependent Leadership?</a> appeared first on <a rel="nofollow" href="https://www.empoweredbusiness.com">The Empowered Business</a>.</p>
]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<h2>7 Clues You Are.</h2>
<address> </address>
<address>Note:  This post was originally published on August 25, 2014 on SmartBlogs.com.</address>
<address> </address>
<p><a href="https://www.empoweredbusiness.com/wp-content/uploads/canstockphoto8522797.jpg"><img class="alignleft size-medium wp-image-2333" title="Boundaries" src="https://www.empoweredbusiness.com/wp-content/uploads/canstockphoto8522797-300x225.jpg" alt="codependency" width="300" height="225" /></a>If you are a sucker for great leadership movies like I am &#8212; Invictus, Coach Carter and Moneyball just to name a few, it’s easy to assume that all leaders embody the same qualities as those in the movies.</p>
<p>Afterall, who hasn’t idealized business leaders to be strong, confident, make tough decisions and stand their ground no matter what?</p>
<p>While those leaders do exist, they are a minority.  In working with leaders for 30 years, I have found that the reality is shockingly different.</p>
<p>Most leaders take on their roles with the greatest of positive intentions.  Yet, along the way, they get lost.  Not by conscious choice.  Rather they are derailed by an underlying dysfunctional pattern called Codependency.</p>
<p>Codependency is a set of beliefs and behaviors that prevent individuals from having healthy, mutually beneficial relationships.  At first glance, the term &#8220;co-dependent leader&#8221; seems like an oxymoron, yet this dysfunctional behavioral pattern is rampant within the business world.</p>
<p>The question is …</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<h2 style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: #800000;"><strong>Why does leadership codependency go undetected?</strong></span></h2>
<p>Let’s look at the top 3 reasons why.</p>
<p><span style="color: #000080;"><strong>1.     </strong><strong>Codependent behaviors get masked by a company’s values and practices.  </strong></span></p>
<div>
<p>On the surface, these values and practices seem healthy – such as, teamwork, employee engagement and customer service.<strong> </strong></p>
<p>It’s not the values or practices in themselves that are the issue.  It is the thinking and beliefs driving them that determine whether the values are healthy or a cover-up for codependency.</p>
<p><span style="color: #000080;"><strong>2.     </strong><strong>Leaders tend to focus on the tangible, at expense of the intangible, aspects within their organizations. </strong></span></p>
<p>The “hard” aspects of business &#8212; strategy, systems and metrics – often trump the intangible aspects.   Yet the intangibles – beliefs, emotions and values &#8212; drive the “bus.”</p>
<p>They drive every action, behavior and decision that impact results.  Because codependent leadership falls within the realm of the intangibles, it goes undetected.</p>
<p><span style="color: #000080;"><strong>3.     </strong><strong>Leaders feel the pressure to maintain a strong, “have it all together” façade for credibility with employees and customers</strong>.</span></p>
<p>Doing so prevents leadership awareness about unhealthy behavioral patterns and the underlying factors driving them.  Plus codependent leaders stuff down their insecurities, fears and anxieties.  This perpetuates the codependency cycle.</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<h2><span style="color: #800000;"><strong>7 clues you could be a codependent leader. </strong></span></h2>
<p>At the heart of all codependent leadership is a weak sense of self developed in childhood.  That weak identity manifests in 7 classic ways at a leadership level.</p>
<p><span style="color: #000080;"><strong>1.    </strong><strong>Low self-esteem</strong><strong> </strong></span></p>
<p>Leaders with healthy self esteem feel in charge of their outcomes.  They take responsibility for the consequences of their choices and behaviors, positive or negative.</p>
<p>On the other hand, codependent leaders have <em>others esteem.</em>  Their sense of worth comes from what others think and feel about them.  It’s painful for codependent leaders to take responsibility.  As a result, they resist “owning” their leadership role, delegating and holding themselves and others accountable.</p>
<p><strong>Values masking low self esteem:  </strong>Humility, selfless/servant leadership</p>
<p><strong> </strong><span style="color: #000080;"><strong>2.    </strong><strong>High need for power and control</strong></span></p>
<p>Healthy leadership power means having choices and the ability to influence one’s environment and others toward a common goal.</p>
<p>As a codependent leader, however, that need for control and power can go into over-drive to feel secure and safe.  Bossiness, blaming others and stifling others’ ideas are telltale signs.</p>
<p>The paradox is that over exertion of power stems from a leader’s sense of powerlessness with outside forces.<strong> </strong></p>
<p><strong>Values masking over-control:  </strong>Discipline, order, rigor</p>
<p><span style="color: #000080;"><strong>3.     </strong><strong>People-pleasing and inability to say “no”</strong><strong> </strong></span></p>
<p>It’s normal for a leader to <span style="text-decoration: underline;">want</span> to help peers and team members because you care about them.</p>
<p>However, as a codependent leader, you <span style="text-decoration: underline;">need</span> others to think of you as a “nice person” because your sense of self depends on it.  You go out of your way to accommodate others’ needs and sacrifice your own to feel good about yourself.</p>
<p>It’s an attempt to protect yourself from painful consequences.  The thought of being rejected or abandoned by your “work tribe” is terrifying to your sense of self.</p>
<p>Examples of people pleasing behaviors include a high tolerance for under-performance and giving into customer demands at the cost of your own profits, values and performance needs.</p>
<p><strong>Values masking people pleasing:  </strong>Customer service, employee engagement, teamwork</p>
<p><span style="color: #000080;"><strong>4.    </strong><strong>Boundary Issues</strong></span></p>
<p>Boundaries are critical in healthy relationships.  They are like imaginary lines between you and others.  Leaders with healthy boundaries know where responsibility and ownership end and begin for a problem, goal or outcome.</p>
<p>For codependent leaders, those imaginary lines are blurry &#8212; either non-existent or too rigid.  Without “external” boundaries, a leader’s identity becomes enmeshed with others &#8212; such as feeling responsible for employees’ happiness.</p>
<p>Without  “internal” boundaries, a leader will experience an out of control schedule, excessive negative thoughts and emotions and lack of self care.</p>
<p><strong>Values masking poor boundaries:  </strong>Sense of family<strong>, </strong>customer satisfaction, trust</p>
<p><span style="color: #000080;"><strong>5.     </strong><strong>Reactivity</strong></span></p>
<p>A consequence of poor leadership boundaries is that you react to everyone’s thoughts and feelings.   As a codependent leader, you take responsibility for others’ emotions, yet don’t take responsibility for your own.</p>
<p>If a peer, employee or customer says something that upsets you, you take it as a personal attack.  You either believe them or become defensive.  Either way, you go into victim mode.</p>
<p><strong>Values masking reactivity:  </strong>Agility, speed, responsiveness</p>
<p><strong> </strong><span style="color: #000080;"><strong>6.    </strong><strong>Caretaking</strong></span></p>
<p>“Caring about” others is healthy leadership.  “Caring for” is dysfunctional and disempowering.</p>
<p>When you engage in leadership caretaking, you are doing for your employees  what they can do for themselves.  You feel responsible to take care of their problems and save them from pain.</p>
<p>You put employee needs before business needs, have an exaggerated sense of responsibility for them and prevent employees from growing into empowering successful contributors of the company.</p>
<p><strong>Values masking caretaking:  </strong>Concern for employees’ welfare; caring</p>
<p><strong> <span style="color: #000080;">7</span></strong><span style="color: #000080;"><strong><span style="color: #000080;">.  </span>  </strong><strong>Avoiding conflict</strong></span></p>
<p>Self-esteem is essential for leaders to assert their thoughts, feelings and needs while welcoming others to do the same.  For such leaders, conflict is a normal part of relationships.</p>
<p>In contrast, codependent leaders avoid conflict at all costs, resulting in emotionally dishonest relationships with their team and peers.  Because of poor role models in life, such leaders grew up believing that conflict is bad, painful and traumatic.</p>
<p>The end result is status quo thinking, compromised decision making and a false sense of team work.</p>
<p><strong>Values masking conflict avoidance:  </strong>Harmony, collaboration, trust</p>
<p>While we all have exhibited the above behaviors to some extent, for the codependent leader, these patterns are all consuming.  They don’t know how else to be.</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<h2><span style="color: #800000;"><strong>Growth, profits and a healthy culture can be yours by addressing codependent leadership</strong></span></h2>
<p>Because codependent leadership has been so prevalent in my clients’ companies, I developed exercises for leadership teams to see for themselves the high cost of this dysfunctional pattern within their organization.</p>
<p>For example, I have had each leader identify one situation where they said “yes,” when “no” (or setting boundaries) would have been healthier and more profitable.  They must include hard and soft costs and then give an estimated total cost to the bottomline.</p>
<p><strong>Even for a single situation for one leader, the costs went as high as millions.</strong>  Multiply that across every leader and every situation when this dysfunctional pattern has shown up and the costs to the company become staggering.</p>
<p style="text-align: left;"><strong>What symptoms do you identify with?   Which are prevalent within your company?   What is codependent leadership costing your company?</strong></p>
<p style="text-align: left;">_________________________</p>
<p>Denise Corcoran helps growth-seeking companies develop game-changing leadership teams and organizations that drive double and triple digit growth … by design.  Her company  &#8212;  <a href="https://www.empoweredbusiness.com" target="_blank">The Empowered Business<sup>TM</sup></a>  &#8212;  is one of the few companies providing whole brain, strategic solutions for unleashing leadership and organizational potential that  conventional methods can’t achieve.  Learn how to master your <em>Inner Game of Leadership,</em> by downloading our free report – <a href="https://www.empoweredbusiness.com/free-stuff/special-report" target="_blank">Wired to Win Big</a>.  Connect with Denise at her <a href="https://www.empoweredbusiness.com/blog/" target="_blank">Blog</a>, <a href="http://www.linkedin.com/in/denisecorcoran" target="_blank">LinkedIn</a>, <a href="http://www.twitter.com/DeniseCorcoran4" target="_blank">Twitter</a> or contact her via <a href="mailto:denise@empoweredbusiness.com?subject=Smartbrief%20article" target="_blank">email.</a></p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
</div>
<p>The post <a rel="nofollow" href="https://www.empoweredbusiness.com/are-you-addicted-to-codependent-leadership-7-clues-you-are/">Are You Addicted to Codependent Leadership?</a> appeared first on <a rel="nofollow" href="https://www.empoweredbusiness.com">The Empowered Business</a>.</p>
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		<title>How Leaders Break Through Sabotaging Beliefs &#8230; Rapidly</title>
		<link>https://www.empoweredbusiness.com/how-leaders-break-through-sabotaging-beliefs-with-velocity/</link>
		<comments>https://www.empoweredbusiness.com/how-leaders-break-through-sabotaging-beliefs-with-velocity/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 06 Jun 2014 22:48:33 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[Denise Corcoran]]></dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Beliefs]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Emotional Mastery]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Goal Achievement]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Leadership Development]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Leadership Performance]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Mindset]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[accountability]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[breakthrough]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[cause effect]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[company growth]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[conscious mind]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[empowering]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[identity]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[language]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[leadership beliefs]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[potential]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[sabotage]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.empoweredbusiness.com/?p=2137</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[<p><strong>Imagine … you are walking through a nearby park with the intent of getting to the other side.  </strong>Along the way, you run into a large brick wall that stops you dead in your tracks and prevents you from reaching your ultimate destination.</p>
<p><strong><a href="https://www.empoweredbusiness.com/wp-content/uploads/canstockphoto135956501-e1402090951506.jpg"><img class="alignleft size-full wp-image-2156" title="belief breakthrough" src="https://www.empoweredbusiness.com/wp-content/uploads/canstockphoto135956501-e1402090951506.jpg" alt="leadership beliefs" width="325" height="313" /></a>That’s what your limiting beliefs are like … large brick walls that prevent you from reaching your destination.</strong>  These mental brick walls paralyze you.  They block you.  And above all else, they seem impossible to move.</p>
<p>In the companion article to this one – <strong><span style="color: #0000ff;"><a title="The Secret to Rapid Leadership Breakthroughs" href="https://www.empoweredbusiness.com/the-secret-to-rapid-leadership-breakthroughs/" target="_blank"><span style="color: #0000ff;">The Secret to Rapid Leadership Breakthroughs</span></a></span>, </strong>I addressed …</p>
<p>&#160;</p>
<ul>
<li>Necessary conditions of any inner leadership change</li>
<li>How changing leadership beliefs changes company results</li>
<li>3 core types of limiting leadership beliefs</li>
<li>Client example of how a leader’s sabotaging belief was impeding his growth to become President of the company.</li>
</ul>
<p>The post <a rel="nofollow" href="https://www.empoweredbusiness.com/how-leaders-break-through-sabotaging-beliefs-with-velocity/">How Leaders Break Through Sabotaging Beliefs &#8230; Rapidly</a> appeared first on <a rel="nofollow" href="https://www.empoweredbusiness.com">The Empowered Business</a>.</p>
]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><strong>Imagine … you are walking through a nearby park with the intent of getting to the other side.  </strong>Along the way, you run into a large brick wall that stops you dead in your tracks and prevents you from reaching your ultimate destination.</p>
<p><strong><a href="https://www.empoweredbusiness.com/wp-content/uploads/canstockphoto135956501-e1402090951506.jpg"><img class="alignleft size-full wp-image-2156" title="belief breakthrough" src="https://www.empoweredbusiness.com/wp-content/uploads/canstockphoto135956501-e1402090951506.jpg" alt="leadership beliefs" width="325" height="313" /></a>That’s what your limiting beliefs are like … large brick walls that prevent you from reaching your destination.</strong>  These mental brick walls paralyze you.  They block you.  And above all else, they seem impossible to move.</p>
<p>In the companion article to this one – <strong><span style="color: #0000ff;"><a title="The Secret to Rapid Leadership Breakthroughs" href="https://www.empoweredbusiness.com/the-secret-to-rapid-leadership-breakthroughs/" target="_blank"><span style="color: #0000ff;">The Secret to Rapid Leadership Breakthroughs</span></a></span>, </strong>I addressed …</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<ul>
<li>Necessary conditions of any inner leadership change</li>
<li>How changing leadership beliefs changes company results</li>
<li>3 core types of limiting leadership beliefs</li>
<li>Client example of how a leader’s sabotaging belief was impeding his growth to become President of the company.</li>
</ul>
<p><strong>If you have not read that article<span style="text-decoration: underline;">,</span> <span style="color: #0000ff;"><a title="click" href="https://www.empoweredbusiness.com/the-secret-to-rapid-leadership-breakthroughs/" target="_blank"><span style="text-decoration: underline; color: #0000ff;">click</span></a></span> here to learn how leadership beliefs can impact your performance.</strong></p>
<h2><span style="color: #000080;"><strong>Detect Your Sabotaging Leadership Beliefs Before They Do Damage</strong></span></h2>
<p>As mentioned in the <span style="color: #0000ff;"><a title="companion article" href="https://www.empoweredbusiness.com/the-secret-to-rapid-leadership-breakthroughs/" target="_blank"><span style="text-decoration: underline; color: #0000ff;">companion article</span></a></span>, you can think of <strong>your sabotaging beliefs as <em>internal terrorists </em>– those voices in your head that hijack you</strong> … <em>you are not worthy … you can’t do something … it’s impossible, </em>etc.</p>
<p><strong>Most of those sabotaging beliefs exist at the unconscious level</strong> – that is, below our awareness – and they are running <em><span style="text-decoration: underline;">your</span> </em>show.  Because beliefs exist at the unconscious level, asking yourself what they are doesn’t work because you truly don’t know.</p>
<p>The BIG question then is …</p>
<p align="center"><strong><em>How can you detect your sabotaging beliefs to achieve a breakthrough?</em></strong></p>
<p><span style="color: #800000;"><strong>The answer is </strong>… <strong>Your Language.</strong></span></p>
<p><strong>Beliefs follow their own linguistic structure.</strong>  Think Sherlock Holmes.  You have to be a <em>linguistic detective </em>and pay attention for those structures.</p>
<p><strong>Remember the 3 types of beliefs – covered in the companion article &#8212; that every leader needs to be aware of. </strong> Let’s take a look at examples of how each type of belief can be reflected in your language.</p>
<h3><span style="color: #993300;"><strong>Beliefs about Cause/Effect</strong></span></h3>
<p><em>Possible belief language: “ </em>If/then,” “because,” “the reason is …”</p>
<p><strong>Leadership examples of “cause beliefs”:</strong><em> </em></p>
<ul>
<li>“If I assert myself, they won’t like me.”</li>
<li>“If I don’t do this job perfectly, they will fire me.”</li>
<li>“I fear taking risks because I will fail.”</li>
<li>“Just when I start to succeed, everything turns to garbage.”</li>
</ul>
<h3><span style="color: #993300;"><strong>Beliefs about Meaning</strong></span></h3>
<p><span style="color: #000000;"><em>Possible belief language: </em>“x” means “y;” “is” (“x” = “y”)</span></p>
<p><strong>Leadership examples of “meaning beliefs”:</strong></p>
<ul>
<li>“Company growth is stressful.”</li>
<li>“Holding people accountable means I will have to deal with conflict.”</li>
<li>“Being a leader is hard.”</li>
<li>“My boss’ high pitch tone means I’ve done something wrong.”</li>
</ul>
<h3><span style="color: #993300;"><strong>Beliefs about Identity</strong><strong> </strong></span></h3>
<p><em>Possible belief language:  </em>“I am …”  or other types of “I” language</p>
<p><strong>Leadership examples of “identity beliefs”:</strong></p>
<ul>
<li>“I don’t deserve to succeed.”</li>
<li>“I am a perfectionist.”</li>
<li>“I am worthless.”</li>
<li>“I will always be this way.”</li>
</ul>
<p>I<strong>dentity beliefs are the deepest and hardest to uncover </strong>as they are rarely worded as above.   Detecting them requires probing questions and listening to the language and context.  Yet change at the identity level is profound and typically a crucial area in leadership change work.</p>
<p>Let’s look at one quick way to change your limited beliefs into empowering alternatives that move you forward.</p>
<h2><span style="color: #000080;"><strong>Change Your Sabotaging Beliefs.  Unleash Your Leadership Potential.</strong></span></h2>
<p><strong>Achieving a complete leadership breakthrough around beliefs most often requires 1-1 work.</strong>  The reason is that each individual stores a belief in their mind with different internal representations – ie., the sounds, feelings and the pictures you associate with that belief.  With each individual, I have to “unpack” the structure of his/her belief below the surface in order to “rewire” a new belief.</p>
<p><strong>With the following technique, however, I can help you loosen the grip that a belief has on you in this moment so you can move into action.</strong>  The belief may not be completely gone although this technique will start the change process.</p>
<p><strong>The ultimate goal of any belief change work is to transform the old disempowering belief into a new empowering belief … at the neurological level.</strong>  Beliefs are commands to your nervous system and it is on that level that the change needs to occur to be permanent.</p>
<p><em>Here’s how to shift your sabotaging beliefs in 1 minute or less.</em></p>
<p>Let’s say that<strong> you have the following disempowering leadership belief </strong>…</p>
<p align="center"><span style="color: #993300;"><em>“I can’t coach my team because I don’t have the time.”</em><em> </em></span></p>
<p><strong>The new empowering belief that you want is</strong> …</p>
<p align="center"><span style="color: #993300;"><em>“I find the time to coach my team and complete all my other priorities.”</em><em> </em></span></p>
<p><strong>With your disempowering belief, you have 100% certainty.</strong>   In your mind, it is fact.  With your new empowering belief, you have 0% certainty, or 100% uncertainty. In fact, it will seem impossible.</p>
<p><strong>The goal of belief change work is to flip flop those numbers,</strong> so your empowering belief has much greater certainty than the disempowering belief.</p>
<p><strong>This technique revolves around the following 5 words in the given sequence.</strong>  The words will be bridged together shortly in a couple of sentences to open your mind to new possibilities.</p>
<p><strong>NOTE:  </strong>Keep in mind the sentence will confuse your conscious mind … and that is intentional.  New possibilities are being planted as your conscious mind – which resists accepting the new belief &#8212; goes into confusion.  Such confusion starts to break down the neurology around the old belief.</p>
<ol>
<ol>
<li><span style="color: #993300;"><em>“Can’t”</em></span></li>
</ol>
</ol>
<p style="padding-left: 90px;"><span style="color: #993300;">(disempowering belief – certainty)</span></p>
<p style="padding-left: 90px;"><span style="color: #993300;"><em>            2.  “Could”</em></span></p>
<p style="padding-left: 120px;"><span style="color: #993300;">     (possibility)</span></p>
<p style="padding-left: 150px;"><span style="color: #993300;"><em>            3.  “Can”</em></span></p>
<p style="padding-left: 150px;"><span style="color: #993300;"><em>            </em>      (capability)</span></p>
<p style="padding-left: 180px;"><span style="color: #993300;"><em>                        4.  “Maybe”</em></span></p>
<p style="padding-left: 180px;"><span style="color: #993300;"><em>                             </em>(probability)</span></p>
<p style="padding-left: 270px;"><span style="color: #993300;"><em> </em><em>                5.  “Won’t” or “Will” or “Want”</em></span></p>
<p style="padding-left: 210px;"><span style="color: #993300;"><em>                                    </em>      (empowering belief – new certainty)</span></p>
<p><span style="color: #993300;"> </span></p>
<p>These 5 words are essentially moving you from certainty that “<em>you can’t do something” to </em>different degrees of <em>uncertainty </em>about your new belief, then back to <em>certainty </em>but this time with your new belief.  This process is based on Rob Ballantine’s principle of certainty.</p>
<p>For our example disempowering and the new empowering belief, <strong>here’s one way to bridge the words to create a shift.</strong></p>
<p style="padding-left: 60px;"><span style="color: #993300;">Possible Belief Change Verbiage:</span></p>
<p style="padding-left: 60px;"><span style="color: #993300;">“I know you <span style="text-decoration: underline;">can’t</span> find the time to coach your team <em>(plug in your disempowering belief)</em> <strong>yet</strong>.  If you <span style="text-decoration: underline;">could,</span> how <span style="text-decoration: underline;">can</span> you think about this so you <span style="text-decoration: underline;">may be</span> able to do this in the future.  <span style="text-decoration: underline;">Won’t</span> you begin to wonder how to do this now?”</span></p>
<p>That’s all there is to it!  Now it’s your turn.</p>
<p><strong>Step 1:</strong>  Identify a sabotaging belief (beginning with words “I can’t …)  and the empowering belief you want instead.</p>
<p><strong>Step 2:</strong>  Find a partner and say your disempowering belief to that person.</p>
<p><strong>Step 3: </strong> Have your partner say the above belief change verbiage, plugging in your disempowering belief as indicated.  Ideally, your partner’s pace should start slow and then speed up as he/she recites the second sentence.</p>
<p>If you can’t find a partner, you can do this process with yourself.  I suggest going through this 3 step process a few times to deepen your sense of new possibilities.</p>
<p><strong>At the end, notice the difference in your state …</strong> the difference in your experience of the old belief … the difference in your openness to a new outcome.</p>
<p><strong>To summarize, start to detect your sabotaging leadership beliefs through your language.</strong> Then run one of those limiting leadership beliefs through the 5 word chaining process, as scripted above.</p>
<p><strong>Voila! You are on your way to moving through the big brick wall in your mind … with <span style="text-decoration: underline;">no</span> effort.</strong>   Relish in the new possibilities for yourself with this new technique.  They are endless.</p>
<p><a href="https://www.empoweredbusiness.com/get-honest-about-fears/">___________________________________</a></p>
<p>Denise Corcoran – CEO, The Empowered Business<sup>TM</sup> – helps growth-seeking companies develop game-changing leadership teams and organizations that drive and sustain profitable growth by design.   Denise can be reached at <a href="mailto:denise@empoweredbusiness.com">denise@empoweredbusiness.com</a> or <a href="https://www.empoweredbusiness.com/">www.empoweredbusiness.com</a>.</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p>The post <a rel="nofollow" href="https://www.empoweredbusiness.com/how-leaders-break-through-sabotaging-beliefs-with-velocity/">How Leaders Break Through Sabotaging Beliefs &#8230; Rapidly</a> appeared first on <a rel="nofollow" href="https://www.empoweredbusiness.com">The Empowered Business</a>.</p>
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		<title>The Secret to Rapid Leadership Breakthroughs</title>
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		<pubDate>Wed, 04 Jun 2014 18:39:10 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[Denise Corcoran]]></dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Beliefs]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Change Management]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Emotional Mastery]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Goal Achievement]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Leadership Development]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Leadership Performance]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Mindset]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[accountability]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[beliefs]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[change]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[conflicts]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[desired state]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[emotions]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[failing]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[identity]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[inner game]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[leadership performance]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[negative thoughts]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[neuroscience]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[NLP]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.empoweredbusiness.com/?p=2103</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[<p>&#160;</p>
<p><a href="https://www.empoweredbusiness.com/wp-content/uploads/beliefs.burst_.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-2128" title="leadership beliefs" src="https://www.empoweredbusiness.com/wp-content/uploads/beliefs.burst_-e1401913341291.jpg" alt="Wayne Dyer beliefs" width="450" height="327" /></a></p>
<p><strong>Does any of these sound familiar?</strong></p>
<ul>
<li>You aspire to achieve great things, yet stay “small” for fear of failing.</li>
</ul>
<ul>
<li>What about the thousands of dollars you’ve invested in leadership books and training, yet still find yourself stuck in the same rut and don’t know how to get out?</li>
</ul>
<ul>
<li>Are you continuously swamped by the endless hours that your role demands, yet get diminishing returns from all your efforts?</li>
</ul>
<p>You are not alone.   Most leaders harbor fears, negative thoughts and emotions that seriously undermine their achievements.  Here is one such story.</p>
<h2><span style="color: #333399;"><strong>How One High Performing Leader Was Sabotaging His Own Potential</strong><strong> </strong></span></h2>
<p><strong>About 10 years ago, I worked with a leader being groomed to become President of a fast growing company.</strong></p>
<p>The post <a rel="nofollow" href="https://www.empoweredbusiness.com/the-secret-to-rapid-leadership-breakthroughs/">The Secret to Rapid Leadership Breakthroughs</a> appeared first on <a rel="nofollow" href="https://www.empoweredbusiness.com">The Empowered Business</a>.</p>
]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><a href="https://www.empoweredbusiness.com/wp-content/uploads/beliefs.burst_.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-2128" title="leadership beliefs" src="https://www.empoweredbusiness.com/wp-content/uploads/beliefs.burst_-e1401913341291.jpg" alt="Wayne Dyer beliefs" width="450" height="327" /></a></p>
<p><strong>Does any of these sound familiar?</strong></p>
<ul>
<li>You aspire to achieve great things, yet stay “small” for fear of failing.</li>
</ul>
<ul>
<li>What about the thousands of dollars you’ve invested in leadership books and training, yet still find yourself stuck in the same rut and don’t know how to get out?</li>
</ul>
<ul>
<li>Are you continuously swamped by the endless hours that your role demands, yet get diminishing returns from all your efforts?</li>
</ul>
<p>You are not alone.   Most leaders harbor fears, negative thoughts and emotions that seriously undermine their achievements.  Here is one such story.</p>
<h2><span style="color: #333399;"><strong>How One High Performing Leader Was Sabotaging His Own Potential</strong><strong> </strong></span></h2>
<p><strong>About 10 years ago, I worked with a leader being groomed to become President of a fast growing company. </strong> He was ambitious, smart and a quick learner.  He thrived on achieving big goals and was the high performing potential that every CEO dies for.</p>
<p><strong>From outside appearances, there was nothing stopping him to take the company to the next level.</strong>  Or was there?</p>
<p><strong>The CEO asked me to coach this new leader around becoming a team player.</strong>  His behaviors at executive meetings gave the appearance that his personal agenda was more important than the team/company agenda.</p>
<p><strong>The truth was</strong> …  <strong>his personal agenda <span style="text-decoration: underline;">was more important</span> at that time.</strong> In his mind, sacrificing his desires for team goals meant not achieving personal success.  He was stuck in “either-or” thinking and that was preventing him from gaining the trust and credibility of his team.</p>
<p><strong>While your limiting leadership beliefs may be different, </strong>what you do have in common is that nothing will change unless you change on the inside first. External change by itself – ie., behaviors, actions or skills/knowledge &#8212; <strong>is never</strong> <strong>the solution.</strong></p>
<p><strong>While change is a multilevel complex process, this leader needed to change on the belief level to realize a rapid breakthrough. </strong></p>
<p>Because beliefs are powerful thought patterns that drive your emotions, behaviors and action, this article will focus on belief change, although it’s not the only type of change that may be needed.</p>
<p><strong>No leadership or organizational goal can be achieved without the right beliefs in place.</strong>   First, let’s take a quick look at the basics of the inner change.</p>
<h2><strong><span style="color: #333399;">A Simple (but not easy) Formula for Leadership Change</span></strong></h2>
<p><strong>When addressing limited beliefs, the goal is to move you from your present state (problem) to your desired state (goal).</strong>  However, <em>inner interference –</em> your internal terrorists &#8212; hijack your best efforts to achieve your desired outcome.</p>
<p><strong>Present (Problem) State  +  Resource  =  Desired Change</strong></p>
<p style="padding-left: 180px;"> <span style="color: #000000;"><strong> ↑   ↑   ↑</strong></span></p>
<p style="padding-left: 180px;"><strong>Interference</strong></p>
<p><strong>                               (Limited Beliefs or Inner Conflicts)</strong></p>
<p><strong>For you to achieve your desired state/change, the following conditions must be present:</strong></p>
<ul>
<li><strong>You must <em><span style="text-decoration: underline;">want</span></em> to change.   </strong></li>
</ul>
<p style="padding-left: 30px;">This condition relates to desirability and confidence.  You must be 100% congruent with the change or goal you are seeking.</p>
<ul>
<li><strong>You must <em><span style="text-decoration: underline;">know how </span></em>to change.</strong></li>
</ul>
<p style="padding-left: 30px;">You must believe that you have the capability to produce desired results.</p>
<ul>
<li><strong>You must <span style="text-decoration: underline;">believe it is possible</span> for you to achieve your desired state and that you deserve to achieve it.</strong></li>
</ul>
<p style="padding-left: 30px;">You need to be willing to give yourself time for the change to happen and to integrate the learnings.   You must also believe you are worthy of achieving this outcome.</p>
<p><strong>When these 3 conditions are present, leadership breakthroughs can happen … in an instant.  </strong>When one or more conditions are absent, then  you must change some aspect of your mental map to achieve a breakthrough.  That’s where belief work comes in.</p>
<h2><span style="color: #333399;"><strong>How Changing Your Leaders’ Beliefs Changes Company Results</strong></span></h2>
<p><strong>Beliefs are not innocent things.</strong>  They are unconscious strongly held convictions that you believe are true and fact, yet they are neither.  They are judgments about yourself, about others and about the world.  They are the lens through which you view everything.  They …</p>
<ul>
<li>Influence your perception</li>
<li>Skew your perspective and decision making in positive and negative ways</li>
<li>Direct an/or limit your actions</li>
<li>Shape your character in effective and ineffective ways</li>
<li>Create the boundary conditions of your thinking</li>
<li>Drive all behaviors, emotions and subjective experiences</li>
</ul>
<blockquote>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em>&#8220;If you want to uncover your beliefs, just look at your results. &#8220;</em></p>
</blockquote>
<p><strong>Your leadership beliefs are the power source for your company’s results and for the culture you’ve created in the present.  </strong></p>
<p><strong>The question is: </strong>are those the results and culture you really want?</p>
<p><strong>You say you have a compelling vision.   </strong>Do you believe it is possible?</p>
<p><strong>You say you have core values.   </strong>Do you have beliefs conflicting with those values that drive different choices and actions?</p>
<p><strong>You say employees matter.  </strong>Do you make them feel appreciated, recognized and heard?</p>
<p><strong>You say that you put customers first.  </strong>Do they believe it?</p>
<p><strong> Are your results matching what you say you want?   </strong>If not, it may have nothing to do with the words you are saying; it could be that your employees may not believe them.</p>
<p>In the end, you have one of two choices.</p>
<p><strong>Either you can keep going as you are and live with your current problems OR you can kick those sabotaging beliefs to the curb for good.</strong>  If you chose the later, read on.</p>
<h2><span style="color: #333399;"><strong>Types of Beliefs Every Leader Needs to Know About</strong></span></h2>
<p><strong>All beliefs can be categorized into one of three types.</strong>  Knowing how each type effects you and your organization is crucial to the change process.</p>
<ol>
<li>
<h3><strong><span style="color: #800000;">Beliefs about Cause</span></strong></h3>
</li>
</ol>
<p style="padding-left: 30px;"><strong>We all have beliefs about cause.</strong>  They are reflected in your goals, plans, actions and decisions.</p>
<p style="padding-left: 30px;">Beliefs about cause are implied in the form … <em>“X” causes “y.”  </em>Let’s take a look at examples<em>.</em></p>
<p style="padding-left: 30px;"><strong>What do you believe</strong> …</p>
<ul>
<li>Are the traits of great leaders?</li>
<li>Drives high performance in an organization?</li>
<li>Motivates employees?</li>
<li>Is the reason for your unrealized goals?</li>
<li>Makes your company successful or not successful?</li>
</ul>
<p style="padding-left: 30px;">Whether you realize it or not, <strong>these are all beliefs.  Not facts.  Not truth.  Simply beliefs. </strong></p>
<p style="padding-left: 30px;"><strong>They <span style="text-decoration: underline;">may not even be your beliefs</span>. </strong> Many of your leadership beliefs, especially about cause, come from books, workshops, other leaders, etc.   Taking on those beliefs may or may not serve you and the results you want.</p>
<p style="padding-left: 30px;"><strong>The point is </strong>… as a leader, you must<strong> challenge every belief about “<em>what causes what”</em> </strong>to realize different outcomes.</p>
<h3 style="padding-left: 30px;"><strong><span style="color: #800000;">2.</span>  <span style="color: #800000;">Beliefs about Meaning</span></strong></h3>
<p style="padding-left: 30px;"><strong>Our brains are meaning-making machines. </strong> We give meaning to past and current experiences, behaviors (ours and others’), communications (words and non-verbal), etc.</p>
<p style="padding-left: 30px;">Beliefs about meaning are implied in the form … <em>“x” means “y.”  </em>Let’s take a look at examples<em>.</em></p>
<ul>
<li>What does it <strong><em>mean</em></strong> that your profits have declined for the last 3 months?</li>
<li>Does it <strong><em>mean</em></strong> you have to cut staff?</li>
<li>Does it <strong><em>mean</em></strong> you’ve failed?</li>
<li>What does it<em> <strong>mean</strong> </em>that an employee has not met your expectations?</li>
<li>Does it <strong><em>mean</em></strong> they are unmotivated?</li>
<li>Does it <strong><em>mean</em></strong> you did not communicate clearly?</li>
</ul>
<p style="padding-left: 30px;"><strong>Beliefs about meaning result in behaviors congruent with that belief.</strong>  For example, if profits fell and you believe it was from a bad decision, you will hold back in future decisions or taking necessary risks.</p>
<h3 style="padding-left: 30px;"><strong><span style="color: #800000;">3.  Beliefs about Identity</span></strong></h3>
<p style="padding-left: 30px;"><strong>Beliefs about identity include cause, meaning and boundaries.</strong>  When you change beliefs about your identity, it means that somehow you are/will be a different person.</p>
<p style="padding-left: 30px;"><strong>Changing beliefs at the identity level is one of the most profound breakthroughs you can experience.</strong> It transforms who you are at your core and every aspect of your life.</p>
<p style="padding-left: 30px;">Let’s look at examples.</p>
<ul>
<li>What causes <em><span style="text-decoration: underline;">you</span></em> to do something as a leader?</li>
<li>Do you see yourself as competent leader?</li>
<li>Do you believe you don’t deserve to succeed?</li>
<li>To hold your employees accountable, do you believe you have to become a dictator or control freak?</li>
<li>Do you fear that you won’t be liked by your employees if you take tough actions or make tough decisions.</li>
</ul>
<p><strong>To summarize … </strong>beliefs may be beliefs of cause, meaning or identity.  They may be about the world around you (eg., experiences or other people) or about yourself and your identity.</p>
<p><strong>Beliefs are unconscious habitual thought processes that either undermine you or enhance you and your desired outcomes.</strong></p>
<p><strong>Nest step</strong> … <strong>Read the companion article &#8212; <span style="color: #0000ff;"><a title="How Leaders Break Through Sabotaging Beliefs …   With Velocity" href="https://www.empoweredbusiness.com/how-leaders-break-through-sabotaging-beliefs-with-velocity/" target="_blank"><span style="color: #0000ff;">How Leaders Breakthrough Sabotaging Beliefs &#8230; With Velocity</span></a> </span>&#8211;  </strong>to learn how to detect limiting beliefs and simple ways for changing them to experience a rapid leadership breakthrough.</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p>The post <a rel="nofollow" href="https://www.empoweredbusiness.com/the-secret-to-rapid-leadership-breakthroughs/">The Secret to Rapid Leadership Breakthroughs</a> appeared first on <a rel="nofollow" href="https://www.empoweredbusiness.com">The Empowered Business</a>.</p>
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